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JackBauerIsGod.com http://www.jackbauerisgod.com Scientifically proven facts about Jack Bauer.
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Fact # 31 In kindergarten, Jack Bauer killed a terrorist for Show and Tell. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=30 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 10 Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=9 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 65 If Jack Bauer were to interrogate himself, the result would be analogous to multiplying infinity by zero. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=64 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 35 People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=34 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 36 Sun Tzu once wrote, "If your enemy is weaker, conquer him. If he is stronger, join him. If he is Jack Bauer, you're f***ing dead." http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=35 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 84 When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=83 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 71 Jack Bauer once killed a terrorist in NYC by pointing his finger, and whispering "Bang!" While eating a burger. In LA. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=70 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 52 When Jack Bauer wants a vacation, every terrorist in Los Angeles is dead within an hour. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=51 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 15 Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=14 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 49 Jack Bauer has never taken a shit that has lasted more than 4 minutes and 37 seconds. Due to the graphic nature of these shits, however, they are taken during commercial breaks. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=48 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 59 Anytime, anywhere, anyone shoots someone in the thigh, they have to pay a royalty to Jack Bauer. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=58 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 99 Kim Bauer was an accident. Not even the pill can stop Jack Bauer. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=98 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 106 In high school Jack Bauer was voted "Most Likely to Kill the Foreign Kid"... and "Best Eyes." http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=105 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 37 Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=36 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700 Fact # 66 Jack Bauer drinks Centox gas and spits out terrorists. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=65 Mon, 30 Mar 2020 23:10:57 -0700