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JackBauerIsGod.com http://www.jackbauerisgod.com Scientifically proven facts about Jack Bauer.
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Fact # 106 In high school Jack Bauer was voted "Most Likely to Kill the Foreign Kid"... and "Best Eyes." http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=105 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 71 Jack Bauer once killed a terrorist in NYC by pointing his finger, and whispering "Bang!" While eating a burger. In LA. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=70 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 48 It's not considered nerve gas until it gets on the nerves of Jack Bauer. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=47 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 99 Kim Bauer was an accident. Not even the pill can stop Jack Bauer. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=98 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 11 When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=10 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 22 When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=21 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 3 If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=2 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 95 On a high school math test, Jack Bauer put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Jack Bauer solves all his problems with Violence. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=94 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 75 Jack Bauer is so ruthless, his 4 inch action figure can extract information more efficently than an h2so4 enema. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=74 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 29 Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=28 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 79 Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, "I have them right where I want them." http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=78 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 89 Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the goddamned bomb was. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=88 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 72 When Jack Bauer goes diving, the Sharks insist on a cage for their own protection. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=71 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 80 Jack Bauer's calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd...no one fools Jack Bauer. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=79 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800 Fact # 45 After 7 minutes of interrogation at the hands of Jack Bauer, Tom Cruise admitted that he was gay. http://www.jackbauerisgod.com/browse.php?offset=44 Tue, 20 Feb 2018 21:13:47 -0800